Winter Fun

When I was growing up and living in Utah I remember my parents packing up the family and heading to the mountains with our sleds and inner tubes to spend the day doing some serious sledding. We made a day of it. Mom made sure we had thermos after thermos full of hot chocolate. We were decked out from head to toe in sledding gear and spent the day hiking or pulling ourselves up the hill on a tow rope and then sledding down over and over again.

When we moved to Washington we lived across the street from some vacant land. There were some pretty good hills for sledding but one small one in particular with a killer ramp/jump on it. The day I flew off of that ramp and lost my inner tube causing me to land with no cushion other than the packed snow is still vivid in my mind.

This Christmas our little family traveled north to spend the holiday with Grandma Dd and Grandpa Gd. We arrived on Christmas Eve afternoon and found them at a local park with a decent sized hill for sledding. My brother and his family had come up from Southern California to spend the week.

My nieces were not used to the cold and snow but loved every minute of the sledding fun. My boys jumped on the first sled available and didn't stop until it was time to leave. My dear husband had never in his life, that he could remember, been sledding before. He was quite reluctant but once he was on the sled, he was gone, over and over again.

After just about an hour KD said, "Okay, I'm done." To which my father replied, "We used to do this for six hours." I must admit, I was ready to be done as well. I'm not as young for fit as I used to be nor was I outfitted properly.

It was fun playing in the snow but not as fun as I remember from my childhood. I guess the older I get the more boring I become.

Healing Power

The first picture I ever saw of my sweet husband was of him standing next to country singer Rhett Akins. That describes my husband to a tee. Music is his life and for that, I am grateful. He has been a great influence in my music choices and has taught me more than I ever thought I would know about any artist or genre of music in my lifetime.

Almost every story KD has told me has a song related to it somehow. I can call him up and ask him who sings almost any song and he can pretty much tell me. KD has taught me to really listen to the words...really listen to the message.

Some of the best memories I have had with my dear husband to date have been from concerts we have gone to together. My favorite is when we saw Mr. Randy Travis in concert at Kingsbury Hall in October 2005. Mr. Travis has helped KD through a lot and in fact, he sings one of KD's favorite songs of all time, "Forever and Ever, Amen." This song means a lot to KD and to his mother.

We recently lost KD's uncle and best friend to cancer. It has been difficult for all of us. Tears still fill my eyes when I think of sweet Uncle J. One of John's favorite songs was "Angels Among Us" by Alabama. Every time I hear this song my eyes swell as I think about our dear friend and uncle. We miss you J!

Music heals!
If you browse through my playlist on this blog you will see a pretty eclectic collection of songs. I love it all. I owe my husband a great deal of thanks for introducing me to such a large variety of music. Thank you my love!

I hope that as you listen to the radio in your car or your iPod, MP3 player, or whatever it is you enjoy, you listen closely to the words. Find a song that inspires you. Grow from it. Let it heal was ails you.

Tis The Season...

As much as I complain about the hordes of people that seem to come out of the woodwork and the cold weather, I really do love this time of year. I love that, for most people, the attitudes change and the generosity is overflowing.

I have been fortunate to witness an abundance of generosity in my workplace. From simple every day kindness to donations for a family who lost a loved one and have found it difficult both emotionally and financially to provide a Christmas for the four young boys in the family.

I've watched person after person bring in food for the local food bank knowing this is an especially difficult year for so many.

Not only have I been blessed to participate in this kindness, I came home from work last night to fine that my little family has also be blessed by an anonymous Samaritan. To this person I say THANK YOU!

May each of us at this wonderful time of year, as we remember the birth of God's precious Son, remember His generosity and love. And may we act in a similar manner.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

What is the going rate for a tooth?

I remember when the Tooth Fairy left 25 cents for each tooth I left under my pillow. Apparently now-a-days the Tooth Fairy has been known to leave up to $20 just for one tooth (http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/wayoflife/03/12/toothfairy.economics/index.html).

Our oldest son has now lost four teeth and has received a dollar for each tooth. How many teeth do kids end up losing altogether? At the rate we are going Z will have more money than mom and dad by his next birthday.

We have four children, if each child loses his teeth at this same rate and if the "going rate" keeps getting higher our friend the Tooth Fairy may be bankrupt by the time B loses his first tooth.

So to the Tooth Fairy I ask, can we go back to just a quarter for each tooth for all children? Let's work on keeping it equal for everyone. That way you won't feel the pressure when a child comes home from school asking why he only got a dollar for his tooth and Sally from his class got $5. If your are not careful you will have kids trying to invent ways to lose teeth.

The economy is tough, you might want to take a hard look at your gifting habits.

I've Been Tagged

I guess I will give this tagged thing a try. We'll have to see what I can come up with as the night goes on...

Seven Random/Weird Facts About Me...
1. I once caught fast pitch softball
2. I enjoy peanut butter and pickle sandwiches
3. My favorite time of the day is dusk (my boys call it "blue dark"; it's not quite dark but not quite light either)
4. Have a hard time disciplining my boys
5. I LOVE my pancakes and waffles with lots of butter and peanut butter swimming in maple syrup
6. I met my Mr. Ledford online before online dating became popular
7. I ABSOLUTELY refuse to listen to Christmas music until the day after Thanksgiving

Seven Favorite Sports Teams
1. Utah Utes
2. Atlanta Braves (baseball)
3. St. Louis Cardinals (baseball)
4. St. Louis Rams (football)
5. Seattle Seahawks (football; don't tell my husband)
6. Utah Jazz (basketball)
7. Dallas Cowboys (football)

Seven Things I Say Most Often
1. I don't think so
2. I'm changing my name and not telling anyone what it is
3. WHATEVER!
4. Find your shoes
5. I know you didn't just say that
6. Go to bed
7. I love you too

That's the best I can do. I don't know seven people who haven't been tagged so I will just leave it as this.

A Time To Be Thankful

It may be cliche' but I thought with it being Thanksgiving I would post a "thankful" message. So, I asked my boys what they are thankful for...

Z: I am thankful for daddy and mommy and for my Kyle Busch car and my Ryan Newman hat. My movies, Frosty the Snowman and Bee Movie. I am thankful for my teacher Mrs. Wheeler and for Mr. & Mrs. Webster.

KT: I am thankful for daddy and mommy, Z, A, B and T (daddy's guide dog). My movie Finding Nemo. I am thankful for my school and my friend Nicholas and my teacher Ms. Wallis and the principal Ms. Hart and Mr. & Mrs. Webster.

A: Grandma, the fridge, the computer, the chairs and my toys.

B is to small to understand...

There seems to be a consensus though that they are all thankful for Grandma and Grandpa as well as all of their uncles, aunts and cousins.

As for me, the list is endless but most importantly, I am thankful for my beautiful family and for the love I feel from them every day of my life. I am thankful for my parents who have been great examples and support to me. My freedom in a beautiful country, and my belief in God.

In a time when things are so uncertain, I am grateful for all that I have been blessed with.

It Didn't Turn Out As Planned, But I Wouldn't Change A Thing

Today I attended Parent/Teacher conferences for Z and KT. As always I was beaming with pride as each teacher informed me how well the boys are doing academically.

Among the workbooks and papers that I was shown KT had a "green" workbook. One of the pages in the workbook asked the question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" and then asked you to draw a picture of what you will look like. KT's answer to this question was an F.B.I. Agent. Wow, that is just awesome!

This made me start to think about what I wanted to be when I grew up. I had plans, I'm sure just like everyone else, I had my life mapped. And naively, I expected it to go just as planned.

I was going to graduate from High School and then attend a 2-year college and get my Associates Degree. School was not easy for me (obviously my boys didn't get their book smarts from their mom) so 2-years of college would be sufficient.

After receiving my degree I was going to work for just a couple of years and then get married. After being married for two years, my husband and I would then start a family. I was going to be a stay-at-home mom.

So, how have my plans turned out so far?

I did graduate from High School and attend a 2-year college. At the age of 20 I graduated from that college with an Associates Degree. I immediately went to work. I worked, and worked, and worked...

At the age of 30 I met a great man and we were married. Shortly thereafter we started our family. I continued to work.

By the age of 36 I had 4 beautiful boys, a great marriage and was still working. I am now 38 years old still with a great marriage and those 4 boys. And yes, still working.

And SMILING!

My life hasn't turned out as I planned but, I wouldn't change a thing.
So to my dear son KT and his brothers I say, keep dreaming. You can be anything you want to be when you grow up. Most importantly, be happy! Oh, and try not to grow up so fast. Love, Mom.

Our Visit to North Lake Tahoe, Nevada

During the week of October 27th-30th my sweet husband and I were able to spend some time at North Lake Tahoe, Nevada. I was there for a software conference and KD was able to tag along. It is truly a beautiful place.

We flew into Reno, Nevada on Monday evening. After about a 45 minute ride on a shuttle to Incline Village, Nevada we arrived at the Hyatt at Incline Village. On the ride up to Incline Village we couldn't see much as it was around 10:00pm local time when we arrive. I could tell however, that there were a bunch of trees and some houses built among those trees. Incline Village is a small community nestled in very large trees. It is gorgeous. One of the comments made by someone from New York was that when he stepped outside it smelled like the air freshener in his car.

We were able to attend a dinner/dance cruise on the Tahoe Queen. This is a riverboat that cruises on Lake Tahoe for about 3 1/2 hours while you dine and dance to a live band. Although it was chilly when we were on the upper deck, I can honestly say that was the first time in a long time I have seen the night sky in all it's splendor. It reminded Kevin of days gone by in St. Louis.

Here are some more picures. If you ever have an opportunity, it is a very nice place to visit.


View from our hotel room at the Hyatt


Lake Tahoe in the morning


Lake Tahoe from Lone Eagle Grill (this is the view we had during all of our meeting)


View of Lake Tahoe from Mt. Rose

Trick or Treat...

We have made it a tradition to "Trick or Treat" at Daddy's office. They have two building and they open it up to the kids on Halloween. They even prepare a Haunted House. So after the Marriott and the South Salt Lake City Hall we came home with a small laundry basket full of candy.

Much to the boys dismay we only went to the house on our street this year. I'm not sure how much candy one household can have. For mom and dad, this was plenty. We will probably be throwing away candy from 2008 this time next year.

We Love NASCAR!

For those of you who know my little family well, you know that we love NASCAR. From the opening prayer to the final interview we love it all. Although we have yet to go to an actual race, we promise that someday we will.

The most avid fan in our family is Z. He doesn't miss a race. He makes sure that he watches both the Nationwide and the Sprint Cup races. If he can talk mom and/or dad into it, he will watch the pre-race countdown as well as any NASCAR shows that may be on during the week. For the first part of the season he would even write in his notebook the results from all of the races.

As far as drivers go...



KD (dad) likes Tony Stewart. We try not to fault him too much for that.



Z started out really liking Ryan Newman. However, he seems to have taken a liking to Kyle Busch lately. We have some educating to do with him.



KT and I (mom) like Kasey Kahne. A and B have no interest at this time. We all do seem to like Dale Jr. Who doesn't like him!

There are now only four races left in the season. We will then be done until February 2009 when it all begins again at Daytona.

We say congratulations to Dale Jr. , Tony and Kyle for making it into the chase. To Ryan and Kasey, we say, good effort...next year will be a much better year.

To all the NASCAR fans out there we say...CRANK IT UP!!!

It's So Nice To Be Home

This week has been a rough week one. I left Monday morning for Boise, Idaho and returned on Wednesday evening. Now for most people that wouldn't be so bad but for me, who really hasn't spent more than one night away from my boys, it was difficult. To top it all off, I was ill the whole time.

When I arrived home on Wednesday evening Zand K were just getting home from the after school program. They both came running up to me with huge hugs. K was in tears. When I asked what was wrong he simply stated, "I missed you!" Well of course that set me off.

In the house A and B were very excited to see me. After hugs and kisses B sat on my lap and said, "You, go, work." Apparently that didn't go over very well with him.

Although there are many times that I get frustrated and wish for some time away from home when it comes right down to it, I hate it.

Thank you to my wonderful husband who spent two days with his boys by himself. Kudos my dear.

Now KD and I are off together to Lake Tahoe. It is a work conference for me and a vacation for KD. It will be a nice get-away for us. Grandma will have the pleasure of the company of the four boys. Thanks mom.

You Throw Like A Girl!!!

Growing up I spent a lot of time on the softball field. I don't remember exactly how old I was when I started playing, I just remember always playing every summer.

When we lived in Utah my coaches were my mom and her good friend Judy. I think I played just about every position. My favorite position, by far, was catcher. I LOVED trying to catch a player when they were attempting to steal any base. Let me clarify, this wasn't slow pitch softball. I could never play that game, it drove me crazy. I only played fast pitch softball. If the ball didn't come across the plate at belly level then it wasn't really softball.

When we moved to Washington mom coached me for a while. When I was in junior high school I had a coach named Ray. Hmmm...his last name just left me. Anyway, I played for him until I it came to an end. I don't remember playing while I was in high school.

I recall one time when mom was coaching I threw the ball to 2nd base trying to catch a girl at stealing the base and our 2nd baseman missed the ball completely. As I'm sure it wasn't my fault at all, I went balistic. I remember yelling and throwing a temper tantrum. And I remember mom putting a stop to it. Thanks mom for teaching me there is more to life and that softball, or any sport for that matter, is just a game.

Now when my boys play ball with their dad he always says to them, "You throw like your mom, like a girl." When grandma is around to hear that she always responds, you should have seen your mom throw the ball. It's good you throw like your mom.

I have to admit, I miss it sometimes. I haven't kept myself in shape and to play now would probably kill me. I just hope that I can teach my kids how fun sports really can be. When I hear about or see parents going crazy at their child's game I think, "Wow! What a horrible example." Too many things in this life are competitive, can't we just have fun anymore? Can't we all just play nice?

Whenever I hear the song of a bird Or look at the blue, blue sky,

Whenever I feel the rain on my face Or the wind as it rushes by,

Whenever I touch a velvet rose Or walk by a lilac tree,

I'm glad that I live in this beautiful world Heav'nly Father created for me.

He gave me my eyes that I might see

The color of butterfly wings.

He gave me ears that I might hear

The magical sound of things.

He gave me my life, my mind, my heart

I thank him rev'rently

For all his creations, of which I'm a part

Yes I know Heav'nly Father loves me.

-Clara W. McMaster

School Lunch

Today we received a phone call from the school telling us that both Z and K needed lunch money. I was sitting at my desk at work and I thought "Stupid lunch money!" Apparently I thought it verbally, my co-worker laughed.

That causes me to wonder, were school lunches really good or was I just too young to know the difference? I remember the mashed potatoes and gravy. Man they were good. I remember having rolls and more rolls. Oh, and the coleslaw..yuck then, yum now. Looking at my kid's lunch calendar I don't remember having the food that they do now-a-days.

Of course, when I was older it wasn't cool to eat school lunch but it wasn't that cool to carry a brown bag from home either. The coolest thing to do was to go off campus for lunch. Besides, I don't remember my high school having school lunch or even a cafeteria for that matter. Small town, small school.

Apparently my kids don't care too much for the school lunches either. Quite often they will ask me if they can take their own lunches. I guess it's cool in elementary school to bring your lunch from home.

Childhood Memories

I don't seem to remember much about my childhood but there are a few things I think I do remember. I spent 10 years of my life living on a little piece of property in Ogden, Utah (Wilson Lane) with my parents, sister G and brother JG. We had a couple cows and bulls, rabbits, geese, a ton of cats (at least it seem like a ton) and my favorite, sheep.

As kids we used to help dad put the rubber bands around the babies tails so that they would fall off. When they did, we went around and picked them up. I had my very own sheep. She was a white faced ewe named Susie. Sometimes we were able to feed the lambs with bottles. I remember they seemed pretty strong for little sheep.

One buck sheep we had was a mean dude. For some reason he didn't care too much for the color green. He pretty much chased anyone but especially anyone wearing green. Many attempts were made to deter his ramming. One time he even received a pitch fork to the forehead. That didn't stop him. I can't remember what happened to him.

The geese liked to chase people as well. And Oh! the smell of rotten geese eggs. Yuck!!! Never did get used to that smell. Cattle I can handle, not rotten eggs.

I remember going camping, fishing and deer hunting every year. We would pack up the trailer and head up with family and friends to the Uintah Mountains. Rainbow Trout is what we caught. I can remember in the fall during the deer hunt waking up early in the morning and feeling the cold, wet air outside. Dad was long gone by the time I got up and it sure seemed early.

We used to go up the mountains for a day and cut our own firewood with friends. Two or three big trucks and/or trailers to fill. I don't know for sure if all of us kids that were there were much help. I remember working harder at taking breaks and find bugs than actually stacking the wood in the vehicles.

Dad taught me how to fish. Dad taught me how to shoot a bow and arrow, ride a motorcycle, ride a pony (we always had a pony), catch a water snake and much, much more. Dad did everything and I loved to watch and learn.

I feel guilty sometimes because KD has never been able to experience the things that I did during my childhood. My kids haven't had the opportunity yet and I don't know if they will. As much as I desire for them to experience it, things just don't seem as easy as they were back then. Of course, I was only a child and I'm sure dad and mom didn't think things were that easy but they always made sure it happened.

We moved to the state of Washington when I was 11 years old. We didn't have the room for big animals, just our dog, Duffy, and a cat. It was a small town and a nice place to live but we didn't go camping like we used. Things were different.

I haven't seen the house on Wilson Lane for years. I often wonder if it looks the same. I wonder if it still has the great big garage that dad built with the concrete floor that my sister and I were going to make into a roller skating rink. Does it still have the slabs of concrete where G, myself and a friend decided to use one of mom pots to build our own camp fire one night. Or, does it still have the great little play house in the back yard that dad built for us.

I've recently learned of some adventures that my father had as a young man. Things I never, ever dreamed my dad would do. Things my dad won't admit to even now. These are stories that mom tells me about that she knows of first hand or hears when dad gets together with his old buddies and they reminisce. I've come to realize that I need to share my childhood with my children. I've never been one who is really good at keeping a journal or diary and now I wish I were.

MMMOOOMMM!!!

I have to admit I get a little tired of hearing that word. I have threatened several times to change my name although I'm not sure what good that would do. I often reflect on my life before I was married and before I had children. Does that make me a bad person? I don't think so. I believe everyone, at some point, wishes they could go back in time. On days like today when I am not feeling well, it is raining outside and the kids just can't seem to keep their hands off of each other, I wish I were back in Washington sitting on the beach along the Columbia River doing absolutely nothing.


Ironically, back then I remember being in my 20's, single and wishing I had a husband and we had our own family.


I married when I was 30 years old. Z was born when I was 31. I am now 38 and a mother of four boys. Honestly, four boys that I couldn't imagine my life without. I know I take for granted every day the wonderful reality that I get to wake up each morning and hear, "Mom, I'm hungry." Several times I get to hear from A, "Know what mom, I love you." When Z and KT get home from school they always ask, "How was your day mom." And from B each night, "Rock, rock mama."


All it takes is a few minutes of reflection for me to admit that I really do love to hear MMMOOOMMM!!!

Blessed beyond comprehension

Today a friend at work showed me her blog. She assured me that it was something simple that even I could do. I was anxious to get started as I wanted to share. Thank you JT.

I have been reading several blogs tonight and realize that there are a lot of amazing people out there that I don't personally know but am grateful for their courage in sharing their experiences. I feel blessed in so many ways right now and have come to realize that I take a lot for granted.

My husband, KD, is legally blind. He has been this way since birth. He was born with congenital cataracts which were removed when he was a child. We have been married since August 2000. I'm amazed each day by his determination to be independent and not rely so much on others. In 2005 KD had his right eye removed after years of pain. This has not stopped him from finding a great job and being successful in it. He is also going to college and finally finding success after several attempts. For KD the college experience isn't like that you and I may have or will experience. In order for him to take notes, complete assignments and take tests he needs assistance. This assistance may be in the form of large print, audio, actual individuals who volunteer to read and scribe for him. It has been frustrating but he is pushing on and doing quite well.

KD and I have been blessed with four beautiful boys. Z, KT, A and B. Before Z was born we knew there was a 50/50 chance that any and possibly all of our children could be born with an eye condition that would categorize them as legally blind.

In March 2001 Z was born. Almost immediately we knew he had cataracts. At two months old those cataracts were removed and he was given glasses to wear. At the age of three Z began to attend school at the Utah School for the Deaf and Blind. He attended two years of preschool and Kindergarten at USDB. When it was time for him to start first grade we decided to mainstream him to public school. He is your typical 7 year old. He is doing very well in school and does not let his disABILITY hinder him in anyway.

We were blessed with KT in April of 2002. KT does not, to this point, have any eye conditions that cause him to have abnormal vision. He is 6 years old and doing well in school. Sweet KT helps out as much as he can when he is asked to look for shoes, toys, etc for his brothers. Rarely does he complain but simply says "yes" and does it. I don' t know that I could be that selfless if I were in his shoes.

A became a part of our family in September 2004. At birth he aspirated some fluids and spent a week in NICU. A was born with Aniridia which by definition is the "Congenital absence of all but the root of the iris." A's eyes look like they are always dilated. He is very light sensitive. A reacted to glasses completely differently from Z. Just this past year he has realized how helpful they are to him and actually keeps them on all day. Last year A attended his first year of preschool at USDB. He is not in his second year. At A's IEP (Individual Education Plan) meeting at the end of the school year last year we were encouraged to mainstream him. Although we were told this would be our decision it sure felt like we were being pushed out. We consented and enrolled A in preschool at a public school just for the afternoon class.

At the beginning of the year we felt very uneasy about A being mainstreamed. We spoke with is new teacher at USDB who was new to the school and not a part of the IEP last year. She felt confident that there was not a need for A to be mainstreamed this year. If necessary he could be moved up to the next class because he was doing so well academically. So for now, that's where we are. A is attending preschool at USDB full time and loving every day.

Finally in March 2006 B was born. B wanted to come early. I had never really experienced contractions due to being induced with Z and immediately given an epidoral and then having to have an emergency c-seciton. I had c-sections with all of the boys. At 36 weeks B wanted out. B gave the opportunity to experience those contractions. However, being early he wasn't quite developed. His lungs needed more time so he spent several days in NICU.

B was born with congenital cataracts as well as a form of aniridia. His vision is the worst. Just like his brothers, he has adapted and gets around without too much difficulty. He will be receiving his glasses any day and we are hoping he keeps them on and realizes how much more he can see with them.

Although we struggle with education for our children and the lack of resources there are out there for them right now, we must remember that we have been blessed. I remind myself often that we have been given the opportunity to raise these children and are charged with the responsibilty to teach them well. I also must remember that I truly believe that we are not expected to deal with more than we have the strength to handle. I am humbled that I have been entrusted with these precious souls and blessed that I am able to learn so much from KD and the boys.